Oxytocin and Sensuality in Reiki

Most people think of Reiki as hands and energy, and that is of course correct. What often gets overlooked is the encounter between the two people involved. When the giver and the receiver allow each other to really be felt, something happens that you can even describe in terms of biochemistry, and the molecule at the center of it is called oxytocin.

In my book Reiki in der therapeutischen Praxis (Reiki in Therapeutic Practice) I wrote a chapter about this, because I find the connection between the old Japanese traditions and modern brain research very interesting. In the Shingon tradition it has long been understood that an encounter with open senses sets something in motion. Today neuroscience can measure at least part of what happens.

In my experience, the more sympathy there is between the giver and the receiver, the deeper the whole experience becomes. Energetic perception gets finer, and empathy also increases, so that you can feel more precisely what the other person needs. Behind this there is a hormone, a region of the brain and a principle that puts sensuality at the center of spiritual practice.

Oxytocin, the alchemical elixir of closeness 触

Oxytocin is known as the bonding hormone. It is released by the pituitary gland during sensual exchange, for example when cuddling, holding hands or kissing, and in general with touch that goes along with trust and closeness.

What oxytocin does in the body is remarkable. It lowers the level of the stress hormone cortisol, which is why kissing is sometimes called a stress killer. It calms the amygdala, the fear center of the brain, and so it has an anxiety-reducing effect. It supports social bonding, trust, being in love, motivation and positive thinking. And according to research, it even improves the ability to recognize faces and read facial expressions.

These are findings from neurobiology, and for me they explain something I have noticed again and again in Reiki sessions. When the sensual sympathy between two people grows, the supportive effect of Reiki tends to grow with it. That is my experience, of course, and not a promise.

If you like images, you could say that oxytocin is the body's own version of what the alchemists called the elixir. It isn't added from outside. The body produces it itself, set in motion by one of the simplest human acts there is, the touch of another being.

The insula, where empathy and sensuality meet 脳

There is a region of the brain called the insula, or insular cortex. It has a surprising number of functions: taste and smell in connection with likes and dislikes, hunger and thirst, the fulfilment of real needs, the emotional evaluation of pain and the inner clock. Empathy also arises when the insula is activated as we recognize the feelings of others.

What I find especially interesting is that the insula is also involved in sensuality, in sudden insights and in the ability to perceive your own needs separately from those of others. Put simply, empathy and sensuality are processed in the same region of the brain. The ability to feel what another person feels, to sense their pain without suffering along with them, is connected to the same structure as sensual perception.

For Reiki practice this has a clear consequence. Anyone who suppresses their sensuality also dampens their empathic perception, and anyone who opens their senses opens the way to empathy as well.

Then there are the mirror neurons. These are nerve cells that respond in a similar way whether we carry out an action ourselves or watch someone else do it. When you see someone in pain, some of the same neurons become active as with your own pain, only weaker. This is one of the neurological foundations of empathy, and it makes it easier to understand why byōsen, the perception of energetic imbalance while laying on hands, is something your nervous system is actually built for.

If you put this together with the energy centers, you get an axis that connects the 2nd chakra (sensuality), the 4th chakra (empathy and compassion), the 5th chakra (expression and communication) and the 6th chakra (intuition and insight).

The pituitary gland and the sixth chakra 腺

The pituitary gland is only about the size of a pea, but it is the control center of the hormonal system. It sits behind the middle of the forehead at the base of the brain, which is more or less where the 6th chakra is usually placed.

Among other things, the pituitary releases oxytocin, which reduces stress and supports sensuality.

In Shingon Reiki there are practices that work with the sensual side of the pituitary gland through the 6th chakra. They are connected with the Siddham syllable (Bonji in Japanese) hrīḥ and with Senju Kannon, the Thousand-Armed Bodhisattva of Compassion. The practice itself belongs in the live events, because it is passed on in direct encounter.

What if I fall in love during a Reiki session? 愛

This question is rarely asked out loud, but it is on the minds of many people who practice Reiki. My answer is simple: yes, it can happen. And it is not a problem as long as you understand what is going on.

Both the receiver and the giver can have feelings of being in love during a Reiki session. Being in love comes with a release of hormones that supports sensuality and longing. That is biology, and it is human.

The receiver can fall in love when their need to be understood and accepted is met by the practitioner. The giver can fall in love when they project qualities onto the receiver, or when the presence of the other person is attractive to them. And there is a third possibility: the feeling can carry over from one person to the other through empathy.

What helps here is knowing that being in love is mostly a mixture of secondary feelings and hormones, in which sympathy, attraction and sensual impressions work together. As long as the practitioner knows this and deals with it responsibly, always putting the well-being of the receiver first, there is nothing wrong with it. The more sympathy two people have for each other, the more naturally sensual experiences can be part of a Reiki session.

So the question is not whether feelings come up, because they always do. The question is how you deal with them. In Shingon Reiki the senses are not numbed but refined, and part of that refinement is the ability to tell your own feelings apart from the ones you have picked up from someone else. As you have read above, that is exactly one of the functions of the insula.

Why feelings don't need to be forbidden 禁

In many spiritual traditions, and in many Reiki circles too, people are told that they should feel nothing during a session. The senses are supposed to be switched off, and the practitioner is supposed to stay neutral and not be moved by what happens.

I see this differently. Suppressing sensuality doesn't help, because the receiver notices it, consciously or unconsciously. A practitioner who freezes their own aliveness gives off a certain coolness and distance, and that can dampen the mood and make it harder for the body's own self-regulation to get going. In my view, open senses are what make change possible in the first place.

In terms of the chakras, the intuition and insight of the 6th chakra meet the sensuality and aliveness of the 2nd chakra, and the two come together in the love of the 4th chakra. So heart, belly and forehead form an axis.

In the Shingon tradition this principle is embodied by the Wisdom King of Love, Aizen Myōō 愛染明王. Aizen Myōō stands for the insight that passion and wisdom are two sides of the same force. His face is wrathful, which doesn't mean that passion is dangerous. It means that passion is powerful and calls for mindfulness. His body is red, the color of fire and of life.

Aizen Myōō belongs to esoteric Buddhism, which reached Japan more than 1,200 years ago, and he is still venerated in Shingon temples today. For me his message is clear: if you banish sensuality from spiritual practice, you banish half of life.

Beliefs and fears of closeness 転

All of this touches on beliefs that many people carry without ever having chosen them. They come from upbringing, from religious imprinting or from fear. Sentences such as "I'm not allowed to feel this", "Sensuality is unprofessional", "I could lose control" or "If I open up, I'll get hurt" are typical examples.

Beliefs like these can change. Shingon Reiki offers a way to recognize them and let them go through practice, which means through experience, touch and encounter rather than through analysis alone.

I don't see fears of closeness as a weakness. They are protective reactions that once made sense, but at some point they can become too tight. The Buddhist body practice in Shingon Reiki offers a frame in which these fears can be touched with mindfulness and respect, so that they have a chance to change.

Which of these beliefs sounds familiar to you?